Imagine you're on your way to meet friends at a bar. You're late
and stuck behind a slow-moving van when the entire street lurches into darkness.
Suddenly that man crossing the street in front of you looks like a potential
robber. The cars around you seem to be hemming you in. Everyone and everything
appears dangerous. You've gone from slightly stressed to completely strung-out
in an instant.
When you finally get to the bar, your friends are deep in
conversation about blackouts, crime and their plans to leave the country. What
should have been a light-hearted, fun-filled evening has turned into one riddled
with anxiety.
It's as though a cloud of
dark heaviness is hanging above us right now. Most of us are unaware of the
extent to which worrying issues are affecting us,
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of stress continues over a long period, paralyzing feelings of being overwhelmed
can set in.
Many of us could be in the heart of what is termed as a
'stress storm'. Have you ever been in the situation where, because of stress,
you couldn't remember the name of one of your own family members? Perhaps you're
stuck in a depression, or maybe you've accomplished something great but the next
morning you don't want to get out of bed because you're so down.
These
are indications that you are caught in a stress storm - a place filled with fear
and confusion, where you're no longer thinking rationally. If this sounds
familiar, read on to understand better what's happening to you - and how to get
to grips with it.
Why are we so Stressed?
In the USA we have a set
of stressors to contend with - high crime rates, rising costs of food and gas,
and an economic situation in which retrenchments are increasingly common. These
compound everyday stressors such as work, family conflicts and financial
pressures. We don't let our bodies or minds relax, and develop distorted
perceptions about ourselves - for example,
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we're accepted only if we're performing well.
When people are taxed on
so many levels, their resilience rapidly erodes. Most people can deal with one
stressful area in their lives - even two - but few people can function optimally
when every area of their life is affected by instability and
stress.
Stress Poisoning
Our bodies are built to handle stress in
short, sharp bursts, but when there is no let-up, stress can in fact be toxic
for our bodies. When we're stressed, our adrenal glands pump out cortisol. This
'stress hormone' is preparing our muscles for the fight-or-flight response
triggered when our lives are in danger. All energy is diverted from other
functions, such as digestion, giving our bodies a burst of energy to ensure we
can fight or flee if necessary. Modern stressors, however, such as traffic jams,
don't come and go quite as fast as, say,
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attacking buffalo. Consequently, the cortisol and adrenaline that our stressors
produce never leave our bodies - our lives are constantly turned to a high-alert
setting.
On a physical level - which is where symptoms are easiest to
detect and treat - stress may show up as migraines, headaches, muscle aches and
pains, skin breakouts (acne, psoriasis, eczema) and stomach problems (including
irritable bowel syndrome and constipation). Emotionally, we become more prone to
outbursts of temper, mood swings and negativity. mentally, we feel less able to
cope. Our outlook becomes distorted and it becomes very difficult to keep our
perspective. Highly stressed people become 'reactive'. This means they react
more to everything in their lives, from the lack of milk in the fridge to the
geyser bursting,
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boots. We become so overwhelmed that we literally get ??beside
ourselves??.
Living on Autopilot
Jane, 27, a fashion planner,
knows this feeling all too well. While working in a high-pressure corporate
fashion job reporting to a demanding boss, she was being pushed to work longer
hours and perform tasks she didn't feel prepared for.
??As the pressure
built up over about five months, I began feeling increasingly anxious. My
short-term memory started to let me down and I would forget things I was meant
to do. For example, I'd walk into a room and then go blank, forgetting why I was
there,
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confused all the time and began talking more slowly and slurred my words. I lost
a lot of weight and at the height of my stress my right arm would get very tense
and feel taut. It's a scary place to be. It can feel as though you don't know
yourself - as though you're having a mental meltdown.'
This feeling is
not uncommon. Stressed people often describe themselves as being on autopilot -
as though they're participating in the show of their own life, but not starring.
They're overwhelmed and often feel clumsy, awkward and off-centre. They may
forget names of people or even the names of simple, everyday objects. This is
due to the prolonged periods of cortisol production, but also, because we're
trying to remember too many things.
High levels of stress can affect our
relationships too. Some people, like Jane, are too tired to go out and
socialize, and often feel they're a burden on other people. 'Friends tried to
help,' remembers Jane. 'I'd lost a lot of weight so they could see I was in
distress but they didn't really know how to help other than telling me to chill
out??.
Others may drink more to be more sociable or in an attempt to
forget, so the glass of wine suddenly turns into a bottle of wine. According to
research women could be more prone to developing stress-related addictions (such
as cocaine addiction) than men. The good news, though, is that stress is our
body's way of telling us to do something. But what?
The suggestions below
are a good start. Don't knock them for sounding obvious - at least not till
you've actually tried them.
Stress Busters
Gain
Perspective
Understand that there are certain things in your life that
you have control over and others that you don't. If, for example, you are
concerned about the political situation, vote. If you're concerned about crime,
join or start a neighborhood-watch program. Be proactive about things you can
influence and let go of those you can't.
Breathe
At work, if you
find yourself getting stressed or anxious,
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concentrate on your breathing. Imagine your breathing is like waves breaking on
a beach. Maintain a regular rhythm. Imagine you are breathing all the way down
to your toes when you breathe in, and all the way back up again as you breathe
out.
Eat Well
Don't hand your power over to food and drink. That
fatty hamburger isn't going to release your stress. Rather ask, ??What will this
drink or food do to my body over the long term??? Cut down on sugar. Sugar gives
you a temporary lift followed by a downer. If you're craving something sweet,
try eating fruit or a handful of nuts. Drink lots of water. Stress tends to
dehydrate the body. Keeping your body hydrated will lessen stress symptoms such
as fatigue and headaches.
Exercise More
One of the most effective
ways of dealing with stress is to exercise. Try to do some form of exercise at
least three times a week for 30 to 60 minutes.
Develop a Positive
Internal Dialogue
This is a powerful way to help ourselves when we're
stressed. We tend to feel anxious about things we have no control over (the
future, other people), and most of what we fear never happens. Remain in the
moment. If you start to stress about tomorrow, remind yourself that you can only
live today - tomorrow does not yet exist.
Talk to a Professional
Jane consulted a psychologist, who helped her see that getting through
her stress storm meant removing herself from her stressful job. 'I took three
months off, stayed home and just slept, watched TV and did nothing.' She saw her
psychologist for a few months and gradually became her old self again, but this
time with the tools to recognize and avoid another stress
storm.